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Annie Elliott Design, Washington DC

Annie Elliott Design

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You asked…Miss Manners about tables in the family room

Annie Elliott | January 20, 2010

I love Miss Manners. I read other advice columnists, but Miss Manners…well, they broke the mold.

So you can imagine my delight when this morning someone wrote to Miss Manners about the sensitive issue of TABLES. It, like many home decorating questions, was actually a thinly veiled request for marriage counseling.

Dear Miss Manners:

We have built our dream home and are now in the process of furnishing it. To my utter exasperation and incredulity, my husband says that he doesn’t want any tables (side or center) in the family room, as he wants free range to horseplay with the children….[the writer then notes that this is not a space, safety, or financial issue.]

I am upset because I feel it is inappropriate to entertain guests and ask them to put their glasses, cups and plates on the floor, but my husband seems to see nothing wrong with this.

Am I being fussy? Is it commonplace to have no tables in the family room?


Gentle Readers, I did not submit this question to Miss Manners, but I could have. I distinctly recall saying to my boyfriend-then-fiance-then-and-now-husband more than once, “Darling, grown-ups simply do not put food on the floor!”

It’s enough to drive a person to drink. But only if she has a place to put her glass.

Alas, I disagreed with the wise Miss Manners’ reply! She wrote, succinctly as usual:

This is not the home furnishings department,* but if Miss Manners can save a marriage, she feels she should. Put out folding tables when you expect guests.

Gasp! Oh no, no, no! This is not an acceptable solution. What about the wife’s drink? What about the husband’s drink? Save the Waterford! Save the gin! Do not relegate your cocktail to second-class status by placing it on the floor!

Here are several alternative solutions:

– Side tables only, next to the sofa; no coffee table for now

– Large ottoman on casters in the center of the room with tray for drinks; roll out of the way when horseplay commences


Actually, that’s it. I don’t have several alternatives, I have two. But two is plenty in this case.

Miss Manners, please know that just because I disagree with you today does not mean that I do not hold you in the very highest esteem. We cannot expect you to have the correct answers to everything.

Just most things.


*On this point, Miss Manners is perfectly correct. Please direct questions about etiquette to Miss Manners; please direct questions about decorating to Miss Bossy.

Interior shots are from XJavierX’s Flickr photostream, as usual.

Category: Furniture + upholstery, Living Room + Family Room

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